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Friday, December 31, 2010

Julian Assange is Jesus


There are a growing number of people who believe that Julian Assange is literally Jesus Christ returned to earth.


Some of the evidence people have cited:


  • His prematurely white hair. Apparently Revelations says Christ will have hair as white as snow


  • The fact that, like Jesus, he defies the establishment


  • His calm demeanor, which has been described as "preternatural", and which is clearly evident in every interview conducted with him.


  • One of the many anagrams for his name is JESUS AGNA NAIL. Agna is apparently a Greek work meaning holy or pure


  • The timing of his rise to prominence, coinciding as it does with the global financial crisis and the massive oils spill in the Gulf of Mexico. All this is said to signal the end of days, which is supposed to come sometime not long after Christ returns to earth.


  • His name starts with a J.


  • He's being persecuted by the powers that be - and also Sweden


  • He seeks to expose lies and corruption


  • A lot of people want him dead, hence there's a chance someone will kill him.


  • Women want him. but it's clear no one woman will ever be able to posses him.

My assessment: There's some compelling evidence in favor of this, but confirmation bias is playing a really big part in the evidence being presented. For example, the white hair part comes from a part of Revelations that also says Christ will show up wearing a floor-length robe with a gold sash around the chest. That hasn't happened. He's also supposed to have a voice like rushig waters or some such thing. I don't see that either. I guess we'll know more at the end of days. I'll be watching from my hot tub in hell.

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